First Place

As the dust settles and the echo of the last battle cry peters out, one lone team stands proud on the Shoddy Mantle, knee deep amongst a sea of fallen rivals and sporadically back-dated blog posts.

WINNER OF THE SHODDY SIXPACK II: ENGLAND

Just a fucking shame they lost the actual World Cup itself.

Final score:

South Africa 15 England 6

You know, I’m not exactly a Rugby expert; But hasn’t this World Cup been morbidly low scoring?

The other scores I’ve posted for the finals have been:

ENG 14 FRA 9

ENG 12 AUS 10

They don’t look like Rugby final scores. They look like they came from Badminton games, or Volleyball. Or Chess Boxing.

Anyway,

1st Place: England

Random English Chick: Rhona Mitra

Rhona is a British actress who you may remember from the Ali G movie, amongst other films. Rhona was born in London to a half Indian father and an Irish mother, so she’s got those exotic mixed genes that white chicks can only dream about. Many have spent cancer-taunting amounts of time in tanning salons trying to emulate Rhona’s beautifully browned skin, only to come out looking quite stupid.

Exhibit A above: Christina Aguilera. Pirates have been known to lick her face, in order to combat scurvy.

In more recent times, you may have caught Rhona on the legal drama Boston Legal.

She appears to have been cast purely on her beautiful looks, and her role pretty much consists of: walking looking nasty hot, sitting looking nasty hot, and occasionally, lying down looking nasty hot. I’m not kidding here, the producers don’t even bother giving her any dialogue. I’ve seen the entire first season of Boston Legal, and I have no idea who her character actually is. Is she a prosecutor? A defendant? A cleaner? Nobody knows for sure.

In a recent poll in a leading Men’s magazine, the question was put forward – who would you rather sleep with? Your partner or Rhona Mitra…and Rhona has been dead for a week. The results came back 67% for Rhona, and 33% undecided.

And to praise her just that little bit more, she’s also quite comfortable around guns.

And here’s one more of her dressed as Lara Croft:

Is there anything more alluring than a Gorgeous girl sticking a gun in your face? I doubt it. I showed the above photos to my Bus Driver last night on my way home from work. He told me he couldn’t wait to finish his shift, so that he could go home and beat his cock like it owes him money.

But then again, he always tells me that.