Slack

I’ve been getting a tonne of angry emails recently, seems a lot of you are pissed off about the post frequency (or lack thereof) on the Shoddy Blog. I could write an entire post about sticking my dick in a washing-machine full of dead panda cubs and not hear a peep out of anybody, but miss a few post up-dates and suddenly everybody is offended.

I’ve just finished five posts tonight trying to catch up (I’m still a week behind, but It’s looking better than the initial 12 day gap).

I’ve got a dozen reasons why I couldn’t update this blog on time. I can’t be fucked explaining them all, but I do know they can all be qualified with this one statement:

I’ve never been so Goddamn busy in my entire life.

The reason I started this May-hem trip was as a stress release exercise. Forcing myself to find the time to write an update each day was a great creative outlet, and I recommend anybody who owns a site like this to give it a try. As soon as each finished post hits the web, you have 24 hours to come up with a new one. It’s great for taking your mind off problems, charging up the inventive parts of your mind which can sometimes become a touch dormant during the everyday grind of modern day life.

There is an annual tradition in the blog-world known as Blogtober (it rhymes with October Lolz!!1!), where bloggers are encouraged to write a post each and every day. It is intended to "harness your inner-crtic", though I don’t think this really applies to me, when it seems that my inner-critic is a depraved lunatic.

The problem herein, is that the Bloggers end up posting a bunch of meaningless guff in order to keep up with the sheer volume of updates required. Something along the lines of:

"I need to write a post today, but can’t think of anything, so I’m just going to list everything in my fridge:

Low Fat Milk
Butter
2 sticks of Celery"

Blah, blah – you get the point. Sadly, this redundant information is usually followed up by a bunch of equally redundant comments.

Miss Peipei says: "Omg! I drink low fat milk too! Lolz!!1! :)"

Cyberspace seems to be jam-packed full of meaningless conversation. I could have written a throwaway post each day, but didn’t want to. I like each article to have it’s own point and function (even if that point seems to be a bunch of dick jokes). And besides, there is a whole bunch of half-finished articles I’m trying to clear out of my Drafts folder.

And finally, here’s the Shit-and-Giggles loop-hole in this whole transaction: I said I would write a post for each day in May….but I never said when those posts would appear. So in theory I could write the May 23rd post in a week, the one for the 30th a year from now – and still be in the parameters of my initial intentions.

Or, I could try and finish all 31 post by midnight May 31st London time.

Fuck it, let’s see how I go.